You don’t “get” it until you’re in it
Something I think about (too) often is how I struggle to understand what someone is going through if I haven’t experienced it myself. I mean, duh, that is true for everyone.
But I will look back at how I responded to a loved one’s situation, and worry whether I was supportive enough, based on what I am feeling currently as I am going through it.
(Did that make ANY sense? There is not a lot of sense on this blog these days.)
So it’s like double pain – the pain of the thing I am going through and me beating myself up for how past Kim acted when someone else was in that situation. LOLOLOLOL.
The life of an Enneagram 2. Sigh.
The lesson is to ask. Reach out and ask. How can I support you? Do you want to be left alone? Do you want someone to listen? Do you want ideas? COMMUNICATE. Don’t assume they want what you would want. Recognize what they want may change. Respect their boundaries. Know it’s not about you if they seem distant. Etc. Etc.
Example: when my snis was looking for houses in 2014 and getting super obsessed and excited I didn’t get it! I didn’t understand that you find the house that seems perfect to you and start to imagine your life there and what a freaking letdown it is when you don’t get THE house. That it’s an emotional up and down journey. When we found our dream home in summer of 2015 then spent some time planning what it would be like to live there, I understood. And yep, felt bad I didn’t get it previously, even though I was genuinely excited when she was, and sad when she was too. (Again, welcome to my brain)
I could give more examples but it’s basically just all the hard life stuff. You don’t get it until you go through it.
Social media assumptions
Last week at the gym someone said to me “isn’t your husband a pilot?” (edited to add – they meant is that his job)
Ha! No! But I can see why you’d assume that based on my personal Instagram. Until I recommitted to posting more of the cats on there, it was heavily flying photos.
That person also asked me if I work at the navy base. Ha. Also no.
But that convo reminded me:
Everyone has their own little version of you they’ve created based on your interactions, and what you share online (and a load of other things). And I don’t share much about his work or mine. So why would they know?
Another assumption people make on my rock painting social media is that the rocks I post are a commentary on what is going on in the world. For example, I posted this yesterday:
And someone commented “Well this is timely advice! Brava for your positive spirit! 👏👏👏❤️”
Ha, here’s the thing. I saw this on pippipost.shop (which I credited), liked it, and decided to copy it. Then I scheduled it to post over a week ago. So each day, it’s a surprise to me what will be on my rock Instagram (because I schedule a bunch of posts at once and can’t remember what I scheduled for when), and not a commentary on anything. Just a reflection of what I felt like painting in the past week to half a year.
But I’m glad it spoke to someone!
Speaking of flying, I’m so grateful for a hobby that requires my total concentration and leaves no room for any other stray thoughts. What a reprieve.
Same sentiment with reading.
And speaking of work, I’m trying so hard to disconnect on the weekends (and less successfully on weeknights). I was doing so well on Saturday then a text set me off and I was mad about that and at myself for letting it affect me so much. Ugh.
Flying to Fond du Lac
Steven booked a plane for a good chunk of time Saturday afternoon so we decided to fly somewhere new-to-us and ended up in Fond du Lac, Wisconsin. Random, right? Here’s how I search for new places to fly:
- How far away is it?
- How complicated is it to fly there?
- Is there anything to do near the airport?
- Does the airport have a courtesy car we can use to get around?
- Bonus – does it expand to a new area on our flying map?
The research involves a lot of zooming into airports on google maps and searching for food, coffee, activites, etc. And that is how we ended up in Fond du Lac yesterday. Just under an hour flight ✔️ free courtesy car ✔️ and a few coffee shops to try ✔️
We had a fun adventure and one of our most successful flights! Steven’s radio communication was perfect, there wasn’t a lot of other aircraft in the sky to think about, the weather cooperated, and we found the Fond du Lac airport easily. Woo hoo!
Now, if anyone cares, some details.
It warmed up a bit yesterday (it was in the 30s!), but it was pretty windy when we got to the airport – 20 knot winds with gusts at 29. We preflighted in the hangar, pulled the airplane out ourselves (first time!),
then I stayed with the airplane while Steven went back to close the hangar door to make sure it didn’t start rolling forward because of the wind.
And guess what? It did a bit. Nutso!
While we finished preflight, Steven had me hold the yoke in place because the wind was making the ailerons flap around so much (I always feel so good when I can “help” with something, even if it’s this simple).
All that buildup to say that after takeoff we were thrown around a bit by the wind but it leveled out when we got to our 4,500 MSL cruising altitude, and was smooth sailing.
A direct path from Waukegan to Fond du Lac would have taken us through Kenosha airspace (class D) and Milwaukee airspace (class C), so we flew more to the west than necessary (magenta part of path below) at the start to avoid that. Then we did a direct route.
We actually flew over a class D airport – Waukesha – but we were 1000+ feet over their airspace, so we didn’t have to communicate with them (but tuned into their frequency just in cases).
Like I said, it was a mostly quiet day with hardly any other general aviation planes out, and we were grateful! We enjoyed a bit of sightseeing – pointing out airports, the Milwaukee skyline, large quarries, sprawling suburbs,
lakes with ice fishers, wind turbines, etc.
Ha, I say it was quiet, but right when we got to Fond du Lac, two planes were taking off right before we were landing. It’s funny how timing works out like that!
As I saw those planes on ForeFlight (flying app we use) but could not find them in the air I realized a math mistake I was making, by not doing it. Let’s say we were at 2500 MSL and ForeFlight said those planes were -17, meaning 1700 feet below us. So I am expecting them to be in the sky (because otherwise wouldn’t it say -25?) and that is where I am looking for them.
BUT, this is MSL (mean sea level), not AGL (above ground level). Which means I need to account for how high above sea level we are, which is 800 feet. So when it says they are -17, they are actually on the ground. So… yeah. I need to keep that in mind.
Blah blah blah. Always learning!
Steven had a great landing! Well, I rated it 9/10, and he said 6/10 then later came around. He had done a ton of prep work to familiarize himself with the area around the airport so he’d know where to enter the pattern, when to turn base, and final.
We did really well with our prep work! Like I mentioned, I was super proud of us for finding the airport right away too. The snow actually helps with that – the runways stand out more.
We wanted to tie the plane down because it had been so windy at our home airport, but all the tie downs were frozen with ice in them. And it was actually calmer. So we put some chocks out and hoped for the best (just kidding – we never “hope for the best” – we would not have left it like that if we weren’t comfortable with it).
The Fond du Lac FBO (fixed-base operator) was really nice, and so was the guy working there.
Steven signed out the courtesy car (it was free for an hour and $25 an hour after), said he would adhere to the strict instructions NOT to touch the lights as to not drain the battery, and we were off!
We went to Just Love Coffee Cafe. I got a chai and Steven tried the coco loco latte. Neither was spectacular, like, I wouldn’t fly an hour to get it again ha ha ha, but they were decent!
We drove through downtown on the way back and were only a few minutes late with the car. We brought back a muffin from the cafe for the FBO worker and I hoped that would make him change his mind if he was thinking about charging us! But he didn’t seem like the type to care (and wasn’t).
We did flight planning, preflighted the plane, and were on our way! The winds had died down, which was nice – only 9 knots, no gusts.
I almost forgot to mention, the density altitude was so low, we had crazy vertical airspeeds on takeoff at both airports – 1000′ a minute. Nuts! We got to our 5,500 cruising altitude in no time.
We followed a reverse course to avoid those airspaces again. And it was quiet, like on the way out. I really enjoyed seeing the sun start to lower and create some beautiful color.
We had a bit of a tailwind, kinda, so we got back a bit quicker (47 mins) than on the way out (58 mins).
Steven had a smooth 10/10 landing, and we did all the postflight stuff (including the “hurry hurry I have to pee” portion) and that was that. A fun day ending with a beautiful sunset.
Random Thoughts Thursday 487
- Khali’s Gotcha Day was on Friday February 14! She has lived with us 8 years! She’s still just my wittle bebe though.
- The main reason I’m going to book club at the gym tomorrow is for the book exchange – it’s blind date with a book themed! Okay, and I also want to hear if everyone hated the book we read as much as I did.
- I’ve been dealing with some health insurance bs. I thought my benefits weren’t applied correctly because insurance was no longer covering something they covered 100% of last year, and I finally got someone to tell me that they covered that last year because of a deal they had with the hospital, and they no longer have that deal. Sigh.
- Here’s a phrase I’ve heard a lot this week – we’re building the plane as we fly it. Sigh.
- I signed up for the last day of RAGBRAI!
- Last week’s mani:
Random Thoughts Thursday 486
- I signed up for a race! Rachel invited me to run a 10K with her in March, and I’m excited – not just for the race, but to see her. She’s the kind of person who always leaves me feeling better than when I arrived.
- I completely forgot to get Valentine’s Day cards for my snister’s kids (or anyone). I didn’t even think about it until I got this cute card and chocolates in the mail from my friend Courtney. Oops.
- We got quite a bit of snow yesterday – at least 6 inches!
- We’ve got a cold snap coming, and the cat house heater has been down since last week (Steven’s working on a fix – it’s a system issue, not the heater itself). So this little lady is back inside again!
- Could Khali be ANY CUTER?
- It might be time to say goodbye to the Gingerbread man. Although I kind of want to leave him there to deter Ned from destroying the RV.
- It’s well documented here how much I hate typing on my phone with my thumbs. Val told me about this mini foldable Bluetooth keyboard, and I immediately put it on my holiday wishlist and Steven’s brother got it for me! It’s fantastic!
- In real life, I’ve been a shell of myself, keeping my distance from most people – not just to protect my peace, but because I don’t want to be a drag. It’s hard being around constant moodiness. That said, I really struggled to regulate my emotions last weekend in KC. I was definitely not the best version of myself. Fun times.
Reading Update (2025 #7-9)
[7] Is She Really Going Out with Him? by Sophie Cousens
Fiction / Romance / Romantic Comedy, green light from Jamie on The Popcast, Kindle
Synopsis: Anna Appleby, a 38-year-old journalist in Bath, UK, is navigating life post-divorce while raising two kids and clinging to her job at a struggling magazine. When a corporate shake-up threatens her position, she pitches a wild idea: go on seven real-world dates picked by her children. Her work rival, Will, ups the ante with a competing column on online dating, and their boss loves the his-and-hers angle. As they battle for column success, sparks fly.
Synopsis: Ha, the notes I left here said “closed door meh.” That about sums it up! This was cleverly written, and I liked all the current pop culture references, but this story and their connection didn’t do it for me. I was pretty bored.
Recommend? No
[8] Annie Bot by Sierra Greer
Fiction / Literary, heard about from Stephany, Kindle
Synopsis: Annie Bot was created to be Doug’s perfect girlfriend, designed to meet his every need with devotion and charm. As her artificial intelligence evolves, she begins to act less predictably, challenging Doug’s expectations. The more human Annie becomes, the more she questions her role and desires.
Review: This was a fast read that kept me entertained and simultaneously appalled. Annie isn’t human, yet her designers gave her emotions and the ability to learn and grow. Despite this, Doug treats her as nothing more than an object. In his mind, they’re in a relationship, but only on his terms. If Annie steps out of line, she’s punished. So interesting, and so ick at the same time. You really feel for Annie, even though she’s not “real.” Read Stephany’s much better written review of it, because I felt the same way.
Recommend? Yes
[9] Beg, Borrow, or Steal (When in Rome #3) by Sarah Adams
Fiction / Romance / Contemporary, follow-up to When in Rome & Practice Makes Perfect, read on Kindle
Synopsis: When Emily Walker’s college and work nemesis, Jack Bennett, returns to Rome, Kentucky, after a broken engagement, her perfectly ordered world is thrown into chaos. Now neighbors and colleagues, their long-standing rivalry reignites. But when Emily accidentally risks exposing her secret life as a romance writer, Jack surprisingly agrees to help her fix the mess. As their partnership deepens, their animosity transforms into friendship and more.
Review: This book had me grinning like an idiot almost the entire time – exactly what I needed right now! I loved their playful sparring, their shared history, and the way they slowly realized their feelings for each other. The small-town charm of Rome actually annoys me, but the fantastic characters more than made up for it.
Recommend? Yes! And you can read this as a standalone if you want.
Flying to KC
I was not expecting this trip to Kansas City (KC) to happen this weekend. What are the odds for decent visual flight rules (VFR) flying weather in February in the midwest?! But we somehow got a decent window of weather and it worked out. We originally planned to be there Friday – Monday, but ended up coming home Sunday to stay ahead of a snow storm coming in Monday night.
This is the third time we’ve flown to the KC area. The first time we flew a Cessna 182 and had to divert to St Joseph, but later landed at the downtown KC airport to check it out. It was kind of intense, so the second time we took a Cessna 172 and landed in Roosterville instead of downtown KC. This time, we took a 172, and decided to try the downtown KC airport again.
If you are reading this as a little bit of foreshadowing, it is, but also… it obviously all worked out in the end.
We left Waukegan Friday morning at 9:20 am, and flew under the Bravo airspace shelves around ORD. That’s always a bit intense – traffic is congested there since all the general aviation (GA) planes have to fly there to stay out of Bravo airspace. Just part of your home airport being near a major city.
We got out from under the ORD Bravo and there was a bit of traffic around one airport then we didn’t see another GA airplane until we got to KC. It was a quiet flight! We chose not to do flight following, and just tuned into different frequencies around where we were.
After we crossed the Mississippi River, Steven let me fly for quite a bit! I used the yoke only – he controlled the rudder. But I got a really good sense for how sensitive the controls are. I was constantly turning it too far right or pitching up or down when I didn’t mean to. I kind of got a bit better at it by the end. I enjoyed it.
When we got close to the KC airport, traffic picked up again, as to be expected. We made contact with tower and got our instructions, and found the airport (woo hoo – last time we flew to it it wasn’t as obvious, but we had studied the surroundings more this time). When we reported midfield they told us to extend our downwind. Downwind is the pattern leg that runs parallel to the runway you’re going to land on. There was so much traffic the controller was having almost everyone extend to space us out. We were #2 in line to land and as we were flying we heard up to #6.
So here’s the thing. Extending downwind is a totally normal instruction. But we had NOT extended downwind here before as it was our second time flying here, AND the runway we were going to use (1) meant that our downwind extended right into downtown KC, as well as toward two huge ass radio towers. It felt like we were headed straight toward the buildings and towers. It was nuts.
But hey, I got a great view of the city.
And I have to say, that controller was ON IT with directing people, and even taking time to ask if we were familiar with the airspace and warn us about the towers.
Phew. I feel a bit tense just writing about it and all I did was sit in the passenger seat.
We landed (12:42pm), got fuel (second time all on “our own” (in quotes cause I just chatted with one of the linemen the whole time, oops)), and put the plane in a hangar, then I immediately had to work. Womp womp. Total flight time was 3h 22m.
Alright, the flight back! We paid for the hangar, preflighted the plane, loaded the plane, did a briefing, then runup, and took off!
It was a rare no wind day, so all runways were in use, and they put us on runway 4, which pointed more in the direction we were going.
Our planned cruising altitude was 7,500 MSL to take advantage of a tailwind (we cruised at 4,500 on the way in). KC has Bravo shelves around its major airport as well, so we had to be mindful to stay under the shelves and not climb too fast. Did we get too close at one point? Maybe. Maybe not.
Similarly to the way in, we saw no GA planes, just a few commercial jets. There was also hardly any radio chatter. It’s like everyone was watching a football game or something?
We departed at 3:32, and the flight was 3h 13m. We chatted the whole time, and got to see a pretty sunset behind us.
We had a lot of elevation to lose when we got close to Chicagoland (7500 down to pattern altitude at 1800), but it became tricky with more GA planes flying around our altitude outside of the Chicago Bravo shelves. We didn’t want to lose 500′ a minute when someone was near our elevation and climbing and headed toward us.
All that to say, Chicagoland area was still busy, womp womp.
(Edited to add – we wonder if ATC was watching the Super Bowl because the METAR (weather report) did not get updated for UTC 0:00 for when we landed. It usually updates 10 mins before the hour, and when we checked at 6:30 pm CT it was still on UTC 23:00.)
Our airport wasn’t though! It was calm there too and we got our choice of runway. We chose 5, and came in a bit high and fast. Steven did a slip (first with the left wing down, then the right) but we were still coming in too fast so he went around (basically that means you don’t land and put in more power to reenter the pattern and try again), did the pattern and came in to land. It was completely dark, and he commented on how he needs to keep practicing night time landings because of its effect on spatial orientation. It was the perfect time to do all that – there were NO other planes there!
As soon as we landed (6:45 pm) and parked we rushed to the bathroom. 3+ hours is a long time to hold it! Then we unloaded the plane, dropped off the keys, and got El Famous and went home to watch the rest of the Super Bowl (yikes).
From the weekend
On Friday I was laughing out loud at a text in HyVee, and a stranger walking by said “Wow, it’s really nice to hear someone laughing.”
He was saying it kindly. I told him I was thinking the same thing, and that I was responding to the person who text me “I’m literally LOLing thanks for that.” I haven’t been laughing as much as I usually do.
I was laughing at a text that said “Have a good w/e in KC. Btw the chiefs are playing in New Orleans not home. lol”
Ha. First of all, I use w/e for “whatever” so it took me a second to realize it meant “weekend.”
And second, that is a very appropriate text to send me, because I know next to nothing about sports, and actually thought the game was in Las Vegas (for whatever reason?) until Wednesday. I did know it was NOT in Kansas City (KC).
We were in KC for a late “Christmas” with Steven’s dad and brother. We flew down Friday and came back last night during the Super Bowl. We turned it on when we got home and caught the end of it. Yikes.
I saw this graffiti on my Saturday run. There’s a misspelling, but it’s 100% accurate.
While we were in KC we got to hear Steven’s friend Eddie play the organ at a church service. Eddie is talented and so passionate about music (and life). I love spending time with him!
After the service he showed us the organ and demonstrated how it works. My first thought seeing him work his feet and hands was “he could definitely fly a plane,” then Steven said that to him out loud. Ha.
And speaking of flying, you’ll get a separate post on that!
Hoping for a pucker free day
Have you heard the term “pucker factor”?
I’ve been hearing it more and more as I read aviation books and listen to aviation podcasts.
I finally googled it,
“Pucker factor” is a military term used to describe the level of fear or stress someone experiences during a dangerous situation. It’s often measured on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the highest level of anxiety.
to see if it meant what I thought it did. It did:
The term refers to the tightening of the sphincter muscles in response to fear
I just don’t see myself embracing this term! As much as I love butt jokes…
Pilots often use the term to describe how tightly they grip the seat during stressful situations
I’ll have to come up with something else to use.
TMYK!
Random Thoughts Thursday 485
- We got this cute new scratcher for the cats. It said $20 when I scanned it at Target, but was on sale for $13.99 then 15% off so I paid like $12 for it. That’s $8 saved for my girl math bank. Woo hoo.
- Yesterday I said “girl math” to a coworker and he’d never heard it before! That was fun to explain.
- Thankfully Ned is still distracted by the Gingerbread cat house and is leaving the new one alone.
- The outdoor cats had a special visitor on Monday. I went outside and opened the flap and the opossum was just like “whut.” I let them be. They’re harmless.
- Greg was MIA for like 5 days and he showed back up this am. Phew.
- Today is our 9 year anniversary of closing on our current home!
- New mani!
Hi! I’m Kim, a 40-something-year-old living in northeastern Illinois with my husband Steven, and our cats, Khaleesi, Apollo, Starbuck, and Eddard aka Ned. My current main hobbies are running, painting rocks, flying, reading, and eating. I follow a vegan lifestyle and work in an account management role. I write about a variety of topics and consider this a “life” blog – a place I can share anything that’s on my mind. Please visit the “About” page to get a better idea of who I am! 🙂
