Lots of wandering thoughts from my run today!

Something I wasn’t expecting to be thinking: I wish we were flying today!

I thought I got my fill with the 13.9 hours last Friday-Monday, but seeing all the plans fly over the preserve as we were running made me wish I was up there. Maybe a flight to see some fall foliage.

Something I’ve been talking to a lot of folks about lately: What I’m doing to try to be present in the moment.

This has come up so much lately!

  1. Last week I was telling Sharon how my big 2024 goal was to “do less” and “waste more time.” She’d asked if I was cycling much this year, and I told her no – only once! Because I usually cycle on Sundays and I chose to sleep in and have a slow Sunday with Steven instead of rushing around, working out. Usually by the time I get to Sunday I’ve been working the last 6 days and just want to CHILL. It’s been nice.
  2. Tiff posted on Instagram saying she is struggling to be in the present moment and asked if anyone else feels this way, and I commented that I used to struggle with it a lot more but the less time I spend with technology, the easier it is. And I don’t just mean the distraction of my phone, but releasing myself from expectations I had put on myself on how responsive I need to be. When we travel I try to only be on my phone to take photos, for essential communication, and to look things up. It’s freeing.
  3. This week at happy hour I was talking to a client about how as we age we figure out what brings us joy, what is important, and what’s worth our time. And that helps be in the present too – when we actually want to be there.

You all know this. I’ve just been thinking about it more. And I acknowledge this is much easier for me than for someone with more family responsibilities.

The preserve where I was running (photo from Aug 18)

Something I’ve realized about myself: I’m very suspicious of encouragement and compliments (in certain situations).

I received a lot of encouragement for my big all day partnering meeting at work this week and I found myself thinking “Are you only telling me this because you think I need to hear to do well because you don’t think I will do well without encouragement?” What the heck kind of thinking is that and where did it come from?! I know people were just saying that because they believed in me and wanted to share it but my brain was being so weird.

People were also very genuinely thankful and complimentary of it all and I found my brain doing weird things there too. I worked hard on it. I should be proud!

Something that fluctuates: How communicative I am.

A friend was telling me they’ve been so drained from communicating all day at work that they are struggling to find energy to communicate with friends and I 1000% get that. I’ve been so focused at work lately that I hardly chat during the day then at night I’m just in zombie mode. I’ve actually been surprised I’ve been able to be “on” when I’m at social events (that Celebration of Life, Steven’s high school reunion) or with people all day long. Maybe going into zombie mode is storing energy for later. Who knows. It upsets me when I’m with people I’ve really been looking forward to seeing and feel drained from life and it takes me a day or two of being together to feel like myself… then by then our visit is over. That happened a few times this summer and I’d like to do everything I can to avoid that.