Ha, one is really short because I don’t have an online copy of it yet!
Here are three articles I’ve read recently and been thinking about (and talking about with Steven and friends!):
How to Talk to People (pdf here)
I 100% agree with this (very short article mostly full of links to other articles) article about what makes for engaging* conversations with people:
- “The key is not being interesting, the real key is being interested — being present and paying attention.” (from author Marc Freedman)
- “You don’t have to be the smartest in the room, all you have to be is curious and kind.” (from author/director Lisa Rubisch)
This is so true. Most people feel really good when someone shows them undivided attention and interest. Everyone is so damn distracted (and sometimes self-involved, gasp!) that they don’t always provide that. So when they do, the person they are with feels very engaged. You don’t have to be super interesting or smart like the quotes say – people are going to remember you for the attention you showed them. Gosh, I don’t remember where I read this, but I saw something about this person going to a party and everyone telling the host they LOVED talking to them. So the host asked the guests what they talked about, and they realized they’d loved talking about themselves to that person – they didn’t know much about this person at all!
So that’s why the asterisk is up there – *it’s one-sidedly engaged if only ONE person is paying attention, being curious, asking the questions, showing interest, etc. Hopefully, it goes both ways.
There’s a Complex Connection Between Exercise and Anger (pdf here)
You know an article is going to be good when you see Alex Hutchinson wrote it! So the gist of this article is something most people who work out realize – exercise can help reduce feelings of anger (ha, definitely ran angry after work on Monday this week!).
A photo from Monday’s run since I have no relevant photos for this post!
What’s interesting about this article to me though, is that Hutchinson points out that moods and emotions are two separate things, and talks about how exercise affects both:
Moods tend to be longer-lasting, they are less strongly associated with an immediate trigger, and there’s nothing you can measure in the brain that reveals them. In contrast, emotions are shorter, are a response to a specific triggering event, and are linked with consistent and measurable patterns of brain activity. You can be in an angry mood, and you can also experience anger as an emotion.
What they found in the study they did was that exercise definitely helps lessen angry moods and even prevent them over time, but it doesn’t “dull or prevent” passing angry emotions.
Intuitively, that makes sense, right? I just hadn’t thought about it in that context. Exercise does help MY overall mood, but if something is gonna trigger me to be mad, yeah, I’m still gonna be mad about it, even if I just worked out. (I’d hope that I’d be less mad after exercising, but maybe only a little bit!)
Obsessed, Runner’s World, Issue 2, 2019
Ha, does anyone still read Runner’s World (RW)? I still get it because when they shut down Running Times (RIP, such a good magazine), they extended my RW subscription to infinity and beyond.
I used to read through most of the articles in RW and now I barely get through a third of it. It’s mostly advertisements and fluff pieces. Sigh.
Anyway! They actually have an interesting article the second issue of 2019 (I guess they don’t go by month anymore? since they don’t know how much longer they’ll be around?! It’s called “Obsessed,” and I don’t see it online to link to yet, but I will when it’s up. It’s about runners who are obsessed with keeping all their running shoes, and stocking up on new ones. They profile two runners, and one has 336 pairs of shoes that he’s collected since 2009 (60 being brand new) and the other runner has 231 pairs that she’s collected since 2013.
Whoa. I thought I was bad having a stock pile of two-six unopened pairs in our basement! If anything, this article made me feel better about that!
But what was most interesting to me was not these people’s stories about why they save their shoes (mostly sentimental reasons – hey, I save bibs and medals, I feel you), but a disorder they mentioned that I hadn’t heard of called Compulsive Buying Disorder (CBD). It’s defined as a “preoccupation with buying and shopping, characterized by frequent buying episodes, or overpowering urges to buy that are experienced as irresistible and senseless.”
Guys, I see this so much, especially on social media. I didn’t know it had a name, just that it kind of gives me a sick feeling (that icky consumerism feeling, which sounds really judgy but I don’t mean it too – I have my own compulsions I need to work on.) So thanks, RW, for actually teaching me something besides how to tie my shoes (really? REALLY?!) and “the best new shoes for you!”
Interesting! I had never thought about the difference between emotions and moods before. But like you said, that makes sense that exercise can help with negative moods but if there’s a specific trigger, the exercise can’t really do anything about that.
Yeah, we have to learn our own calming reactions to our triggers. That’s much harder than exercising!!! (for me, anyway)
I still get Runner’s World, but I had to laugh at your description of it, because the articles are odd sometimes. There will be a 500 page article about nothing, and I end up wondering why I haven’t cancelled my subscription yet! I saw that article about the obsessed shoppers but haven’t read it yet.
I am glad it made you laugh! I miss the old in depth articles they used to do about random runners and community stuff! It mostly reads like an advert now! 🙁
Let me know what you think of that article!
HOW CAN SOMEONE AFFORD 60 PAIRS OF UNOPENED RUNNING SHOES?? I mean, even going cheap at $100/pair, who has that kind of money? I must be doing something wrong…
Actually, the only pair I’ve saved was my first pair of Newtons that I bought the day after my first half marathon – I think I felt like a real runner and was ready to graduate from my white Forest Gump Brooks shoes, LOL.
I know they said they are stocking up when they are on sale, but yeah, good point. Maybe it’s the ONLY thing they spend money on!
Aww, so do you have them in the box or out? This guy in the article had them all still in the boxes with notes on the boxes about what race he wore them for.
I didn’t think to save the box!
I get Runner’s World through my CARA membership (I think? I know that used to be a perk of having a CARA membership, and since I still get the magazine and haven’t subscribed to it any other way, I assume that’s why it still keeps showing up in my mailbox). I’m obviously not unique in thinking the magazine has gone WAY downhill – it’s been bad since David Willey left two years ago. Anyway. I got the most recent issue last week, but haven’t gotten to the Obsessed article yet. It sounds fascinating! Even for sentimental reasons, I can’t imagine keeping ALL my running shoes – they take up so much space! The CBD stuff sounds particularly interesting. I think I have the opposite of it – getting me to buy anything other than necessary groceries is like pulling teeth!
That must be why you get it! It’s such a bummer how much it’s changed 🙁
LMK what you think when you read it! I wonder what percentage is more like you and which has CBD. And which is in between. I find all that interesting.
I haven’t had a subscription to Runner’s World in many, many years and I am sad to hear how much it’s gone downhill.
As to the emotions/moods thing – that is interesting! I do think exercise really helps to regulate moods – for me it’s a big factor in regulating and decreasing anxiety. So in that way it helps you to deal better with situations that make you feel angry or anxious, because it puts you on more of an even keel, even if it can’t completely eliminate the anger or anxiety. That’s my experience, anyway.
It IS sad! Do you read any Belgian magazines?
Good point! If you are more chill overall from working out, you might not react AS strongly to that emotional trigger!
No, I don’t read magazines anymore, unless I have to wait in a waiting room somewhere and they have some 😉