Yuck. School begins in less than a week. I am neither mentally nor physically prepared to go back. I wonder if anyone else experiences anxiety similar to my own on the first day of class. I always feel like I am going through a major culture shock. Even though I keep myself busy, both at work and home, during the summer, it does not compare to my school schedule. I feel like every waking minute has to be dedicated to some school related project. I feel bad for sitting down to eat a nice meal. I even feel bad for sleeping at night!
From my observations this summer, I think it is accurate to say that not much changes when you become an architect. I struggle to leave my office at six. I usually feel like there is more work I could be doing if I stayed. My boss and his partner always stay later, take work home, and work on the weekends. They both have families, but I know they struggle to balance them with work. Is it possible to be a successful architect and have a family? My brother’s girlfriend asked me when I was planning on having kids, and I told her I was waiting until I am at least thirty – and she laughed at me! I think it is becoming more normal for women to have careers first and children later… but I don’t want to be 60 when my children graduate from college! And when I do have children, I don’t want to quit work because I have a child. But I don’t want to leave my child at home with a nanny either!. Maybe when I am thirty there will be anti-aging technology, and I can stay young as long as I want (us humans, always trying to cheat death). As for now, I should probably spend my time focusing on our wedding, not worrying about having children.
Another reason I don’t particularly look forward to a new school year is because of money. I must say, I am lucky that there is an architecture school in my home state of Iowa, because the out-of-state tuition is absolutely ridiculous. But it is still expensive – tuition, my apartment, food, gas, supplies, deodorant, etc, it all adds up. And the architecture school schedules a field trip for each semester. At first they were not so expensive, taking a bus to Des Moines, or taking the train to Chicago. But flying to New York City and Montreal, and spending a semester in Rome – it puts a big dent in the already jalopy checkbook. I can proudly say I will be paying off my student loans until I am dead. I feel even worse for my out-of-states colleagues. They will probably be in debt until well after they die.
And I am a little nervous about this Rome trip. Where will I live? Will I have internet access (I know, it is sad that I think that is important)? Will I have pots and pans to use? Will I be able to take prescription medicine over there? What if I get sick? I am not worried about the language barrier or being away from my family. I am just nervous about all the little logistical details. All the students going on the trip are required to take a prep course about Rome, so I am sure they will explain all these little details there. Part of me just wants to know NOW. Enough complaining. This is just what’s on my mind right now.
